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Ladies and gentlemen, the word procrastinator has taken on new meaning today. The final paper for my writing class was due this evening at 5:00 pm when class started. Let’s examine a brief instructor-student interaction, shall we?

Note: Some names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Me: Um, Ms. Abu-Kidajah-Sik-al-Akari, my research paper isn’t quite done yet [nor has it been started, but I felt at liberty to omit that minor detail] because I’ve been working so hard on the other paper [more fuel for the fire—I was out with Alix last night for our anniversary] that was also due today. If it wouldn’t be too much trouble, would I be able to email the paper to you later this week?

Her: Sure.

Me: Thank you so much. I shall sing your praises to all nations of the earth and extol your virtues among the—

And so here I am. A stack of books, an empty Word document, and Wikipedia open in another window. It just doesn’t get any better than this, folks.

stacked-books.jpg

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